44 Veterans a Day: The Weight of Words and the Battle Beyond Service 

Sep 08 2025 03:29

Renee Kasuboski

44 Veterans a Day: The Weight of Words and the Battle Beyond Service   ?

A 2022 study revealed a harrowing truth: when overlooked causes like overdose deaths linked to suicidal behavior are included, an estimated   44 veterans die by suicide every single day —about   2.4 times higher   than the official VA estimate ( Military Times ,   Mission Roll Call ).

That adds up to:

  • 308 a week
  • 1,233 a month
  • 16,060 a year
  • 80,300 in 5 years
  • 160,600 in 10 years

These numbers are devastating. These are not just statistics—they are   our brothers and sisters, our friends, our neighbors.

And these numbers don’t even include   police officers, firefighters, or EMTs. Every one of these professions is essential to our neighborhoods and our nation. They are the people who show up on our darkest days, handling the most difficult moments of our entire lives. They all answered the call.

Why Suicide Rates Are So High

There is no single reason for this heartbreaking epidemic. The truth is that it’s a   storm of multiple factors:

  • Invisible injuries: PTSD, C-PTSD, traumatic brain injuries, chronic pain, exposure to toxins like Agent Orange and burn pits.
  • Daily pressures: Marital stress, divorce, custody disputes, job loss, unemployment, financial strain.
  • System failures: VA backlogs, delays in care, wrong medications, lack of timely treatment, or conflicting prescriptions.
  • Isolation and loss of purpose: Transitioning out of the military or emergency services can feel like stepping off a cliff into disconnection.
  • Coping through numbing: Alcohol, drugs, caffeine, or even over-exercising through injury—behaviors that can spiral into addiction.
  • Stigma: Shame, judgment, or dismissal—sometimes from society, sometimes from fellow veterans or responders—adds weight to an already unbearable load.

In fact, recent data shows the suicide rate in the   first year after separation   is especially high— 46.2 per 100,000, compared to 34.7 overall ( RAND ). And as journalists have pointed out,   “one story does not fit all”   when it comes to suicide ( Health Journalism ). It is not just combat trauma—it’s the web of daily pressures, systemic struggles, and societal stigma that silently push people toward despair.

The Weight of Words: Stigma Hurts

Mental health and suicide prevention are not only about programs or hotlines—they are also about   how we treat each other. Words can either heal or harm.

Too often, veterans and first responders hear things like:

  • “I can’t possibly be a veteran because I’m a woman.”
  • “If you didn’t serve in combat, you’re not a real veteran.”
  • “Because you have a service dog, you must be lonely and miserable.”
  • “If you need therapy or meds, you’re broken.”
  • “You signed up for this—stop complaining.”
  • “Real cops, firefighters, or EMTs don’t cry.”
  • “If you need therapy, you’re not fit for duty.”
  • “It’s just part of the job—suck it up.”

These comments are not just careless—they are dangerous. Veterans and first responders already carry invisible injuries, trauma, and stress. To then face ridicule, sexism, or dismissal only drives the knife deeper.

Flip the Script: What We Should Say Instead

Imagine if we chose compassion instead of criticism. Here’s how we can   flip the script:

  • Instead of “You’re not a real veteran unless you served in combat,” say:   “Every role matters. It takes the whole team to complete the mission.”
  • Instead of “Because you have a service dog, you must be miserable,” say:   “Your service dog is a loyal partner. I’m glad they’re by your side.”
  • Instead of “You signed up for this—quit complaining,” say:   “Your service is meaningful, and it’s okay to talk about how hard this is.”
  • Instead of “Real first responders don’t cry,” say:   “You’re human. Showing emotion is courage, not weakness.”
  • Instead of “Therapy means you’re unfit for duty,” say:   “Taking care of your mental health helps you keep doing the work you were called to do.”

?   If you wouldn’t say it to someone standing on the edge, don’t say it at all.   Flip the script. Offer encouragement. Be the reason someone chooses to stay.

Solutions: What We Can Do

The suicide crisis is overwhelming—but it is not hopeless. Together, we can act:

  1. Check in and stay present
    Don’t wait for someone to reach out. Be the one to call, to text, to sit with them in silence if needed.
  2. Normalize help-seeking
    Make therapy, peer support, and wellness resources part of the conversation. Seeking help is strength, not weakness.
  3. Connect to resources
    Know where to turn—and share that knowledge widely (see below for trusted organizations).
  4. Advocate for better care
    Push for policies that improve mental health services, staffing, and access for veterans and first responders.
  5. Break stigma daily
    Challenge harmful comments. Model compassion. Remind people that no one is broken for struggling.

Where to Turn for Help

You are   not alone. Veterans, service members, first responders, and their families have access to a powerful network of organizations that provide peer support, benefits guidance, wellness programs, and crisis help.

Veteran & Military Support

First Responder Mental Health & Family Support

How We Move Forward—Together

At   Fox Valley Warrior Aid Alliance   and the   Center for Suicide Awareness, we believe in   practical tools, trusted resources, and human connection. Whether through   Warrior Response Tool Kits, resilience training, or the 24/7 confidential support of   HOPELINE™ (Text 741741), we are building a safety net where no one slips through the cracks.

Final Word

If you or someone you know is struggling:
?Text   HOPELINE™ to 741741  to connect with one of our trained crisis counselors. (Every day, confidential, emotional support textline, 24/7, 365)

Check on your battle buddies. Share the resources. Speak with kindness. Act with intention.   Please don’t wait until it’s too late.

Together, we can stop the loss.
Together, we can save lives.

#VeteranMentalHealth #StopSuicide #FlipTheScript #FoxValleyWarriorAidAlliance #HopeLine #CenterForSuicideAwareness